The sides of this equation are not balanced. Somehow, a secret factor has snuck in. Which is probably: stupidity. Mine. And a fuck of a lot of it. I don't see how things could have equaled out to what they did otherwise. Just an utter shithole of a day, complete with waste, yelling, tickets, impending death, and jealousy of impending death. Tension here today couldn't be cut with a fucking saw.

I begged of God and promised myself so many things, changed my mind, my life, myself, so many times in that hour. Take me? No. Take me..somewhere else? Maybe. No. Vow of silence? Broken already. Fasting? We'll see.

She is a scary mirror. Inhale.



And exhale. I'm so fucking silly.