The Animals

The animals are those things that God likes but doesn't love.

Ahahaha....



On a related note, my family is somewhat like a small gathering of various animals. So...so loud. And obnoxious and crazy and melodramatic and random and impulsive and irrational... oh my Jesus! They've taught me by default to never be embarrassed of anything. Defense mechanism, really. I sat at the table at Baskin Robbins, looking at each face...Nonna, Mom, Christopher, Aunt Diana, Kristina...and I panicked a tiny bit thinking: Do I really know these people? Not out of embarrassment, but because did I really know these people? But then I realized that if I don't know these people, then I don't know anybody. And that's good enough. I love them.

And on another note, Nonna's husband is dying. And I'm conflicted. What he did to me...not right. But he won't apologize. He won't see a doctor. He did this to himself and knowingly. Should I make things right with him? Is it right to make things right with him? Or is it almost selfish, because I'm only making things right because he's dying? Or should I keep my scruples and pride and still snub him? But somehow that seems wrong. But I don't know how to approach this even if I did want to make things right. I wish he would have been the man about this. But alcohol did this all. But he became the alcohol. He chose it over everything. And now he's destroyed himself. Is it my right to judge, though? I just don't know.