strobe lights

Blink in. This is where I go to remember. This is where I go to feel you. To feel alive. Only a memory that can't be revisited, even if it were to happen exactly as it had before. I walk to the park. Sit on the swings. I drive to no where and every where. Four square walls and borders. An ocean. This is where I go to feel full and empty all at once.

Blink out. This is where I go to forget. This is where I go to disappear from anything that matters in any sort of conventional sense. In a way, it doesn't. A perpetual haze. I dive into my mind with a sort of unnatural control. I weed you out. I suffocate it all. I build my own walls, you helped me to construct them but you came out on the wrong side.

I begged to forget and now I have. I begged to forget it all. Now I couldn't feel you if I tried. All that's left is the residue of a memory, a memory of a memory. My mind burns vaguely in the spot you once dwelt. I used to cry every day. Now I don't remember how. All that's left is apathy.